So Joe noticed last night that right before every doctor's appointment I get very tense. I don't know how normal this is, but the fact is, I'm terrified that the doctor will have bad news for us.
There's no real reason for me to think this. Everything seems to be going fine with me, no spotting, no pain, no weird symptoms. Just a huge amount of free floating paranoia.
I'm telling myself that it will go away once I can feel the baby moving, but until then, I'm thinking of renting a fetal monitor for a couple of months. The one my friend Stef gave me is not very sensitive. Apparently you don't really hear the heartbeat with it until much later in the pregnancy and as my sister says, by that time you're getting kicked in the ribs all the time, so you don't need the reassurance as much.
The one thing I'm hanging on to right now is the fact that once my sisters got past the third month, there were no real problems with their pregnancies. I know that every pregnancy is different, but it does make me feel better that, genetically at least, there is a good track record.
1 comment:
I had the same thing with Abi and it's come back with this pregnancy. I was thrilled when Abi started moving then found myself getting a bit uptight when she wasn't moving at what I had come to think of as her regular performance times.
Try to avoid the internet as it is both a blessing and a curse since you have access to way too much information which can just feed your paranoia or guilt (depending on your mood at the time).
I became very Zen when I was carrying Abi and am trying to keep that same mindset with this baby...
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